Designers (almost) pull their head outta their...

In jest, in jest. Designers are glorious, even more so when their heads are thinking about other peoples' arses.

I'm talking about the PeePoople. Seriously. According to their site, 6.2 billion people don't have access to sanitation, it's a huge issue in developing countries where this gadget is a lifesaver.

So how does it work?

Well you peepoo into a bag, close the bag and bury it. The bag biodegrades and it's contents turn into fertiliser. You can use it chamberpot, or just straight into the bag. It doesn't require water for sanitation - which is all very well and good.

So....Closer to home. I'm thinking this will revolutionise festivals, bush walks, and when you housemate spends too long in the bathroom and you're busting for your morning 'rush'.

The possibilities for the peepoople are as endless as the poo, wee and bottom jokes (that I am desperately trying show restraint with).

So thank you whoever designed this, I can only imagine the product testing and research phases (sorry).

Oh, oh and let's not forget the 'Go-Girl' my first favourite wee invention, for women who "Don't take life sitting down"

Four excellent things to do in the next two weeks

I must becoming 'Sydney'. Because where previously I would always defend Melbourne as the epicentre of cool and interesting, now - not so much.

Not in the least because having just looked at my diary, I have four excellent, excellent things to do (yeah, well organise - kinda) in the next two weeks.

So in the nicest possible way, up yours Melbourne! Us 'special' kids up north are doing it even though if it means all of a sudden I have this weird dual-state personality thing and don't really know where my loyalties lie (those who have ever swapped football teams have an inkling of how I may been feeling).

Here's what's on.

GreenUps - TONIGHT

Green drinking for green thinking. It's the kick-of event for this year, come old, come new and find out about all GreenUps plots being hatched for the coming year.

The Falconer Cafe, Oxford St Paddington (near the corner of Riley St, head toward the park).

6pm till late

FREE

2. Karaoke for arrested elves THIS FRIDAY

In December last year, a troupe of merry Carbon Trading Elves celebrated an early Christmas with carbon trading profiteers, singing carols at corporate offices including Merrill Lynch and Macquarie Bank. Unfortunately our friends at the NSW police showed a distinct lack of holiday spirit, and now Holly, JP and Rachel are facing costly court cases.

What better way to support our carollers than to raise your voice in all its tuneless glory? Come along to our karaoke fundraiser, knock back some beers, and take on that torch song you’ve always sung in the shower…

Friday, 5^th February

7:30-12pm

The Workshop, 16 Sloane St, Newtown

(Map here: http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=16+sloane+st+newtown&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=16+Sloane+St,+Newtown+New+South+Wales+2042,+Australia&z=16)

$5+ suggested donation

Drinks and some snacks available

2. Launch of the Kitchen & Garden Project - THIS SATURDAY

Carriageworks Kitchen Garden Project is a series of free community activites and workshops based on the notion of creative sustainability .

Guest speakers include Michael Mobbs and Robyn Williams. There'll be a bunch of stalls with all the latest in lovely organic food, plants and Sydney community gardening shenanigans.

Saturday February 6,

1pm-4pm

Carriageworks, Eveleigh Street Redfern.

Free.

3. Reclaim the Lanes - NEXT SATURDAY

Grab your bike and join the roving street party to reclaim Newtown's lanes. Bands, installations and art along the way.

Begins at the Hub at 2pm

Saturday February 13.

Newtown.

http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=246612289646&ref=ts

4. Angel Street Valentine's Day Soiree - NEXT SUNDAY

Walked past a zillion times but never stuck your head in? Well here's your golden opportunity to drag your Valentine (or friend or Mum or kids) away for a day of music, gardening, workshops and yummy food.

There'll be Permablitz Speed-dating, workshops, solar-powered music (the Sunchasers), yumbo food and wormies.

Sunday February 14,

9am till 4pm

Angel Street Newtown, behind the Newtown Performing Arts High School

Free. Bring hats, sunscreen, water, and gloves.

Glory be bikes, worms, veggies, food and sunshine - get amongst it kids!

GreenUps tonight.

If you haven't yet been, then you're either really, really, really lazy or live in another state.

As part of the committee (with Liane, KB, Phil, Alistair, Dave & Ben), I'm a bit excited about what's in store for this year. We have some slick new venues and spaces, and as always are super keen to find out what you want from the thang.

GreenUps is the Sydney incantation of Green Drink International. It's a monthly get-together of sustainability-minded or curious folks to have a chat, find opportunities to collaborate and fall in love (and while this in not a formal objective of GreenUps, it seems to happen often).

So, it's the first Tuesday of the month. (TONIGHT)

http://www.greenups.net/

At the Falconer, on Oxford st (near Riley, turn left toward to park).

Starts at 6 till late.

Is FREE.

Here are the links

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=52193147123&ref=ts

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=52193147123&ref=ts

Immature? Silly? Yes. Funny? Yes. But there is a lesson to be learnt...

Take care when choosing the colour of your saddle.

The 'C' is for Curmudgeon - why Xmas need not be so gross.

Yep, it’s that time again. Minds are lost, stress levels rise and we all go a little ‘na’nas trying to figure out which throw away gift will best provide momentary gratitude and fleeting approval. Schedules are juggled as we try and figure how much we can fit in our fridge; the whole idea of ‘sustainable living’ is shirked as a tad unrealistic as we find ourselves thinking, who the hell has the time to find/make biodegradable baubles and vegan mince pies?

Junk and stuff is gathered - lights, tinsel, stars, hats; food pushes the insides of your belly so hard buttons erupt. Momentarily we’ll pause to how wasteful, silly and cruel Christmas is as we’re advertised to by sweltering young Indian students dresses as Santa hold ‘Christmas Mega Sale’ signs.

And for those die-hards who make the effort to be sustainable during the silly season (we applaud you), it’s not always so easy to enforce your ideas onto others.

But then again, maybe it is? Here are some common silly season scenarios that are just begging for not only a sustainable bur practical and humane touch – warm and fuzzies guaranteed.

a) Kris Kringle

No it’s not fair! You have to buy something for your [insert obligatory recipient]. Thanks to Kris Kringle, most of us will end up in an awkward buying position- especially if you draw a work colleague or family member you don’t rate/know/like the smell of. What to do?

b) Person you have the hots for or would really like to impress

This time of year is also the time where that casual fling might just turn into a budding romance and is the perfect time to make the move on someone you’ve been eyeing off all year. What better way to say ‘so…how bout it?’ that with an excellent little gift – but what to give?

c) You’re a jerk

There’s also the situation where at sometime throughout the year you have been a real little (or big) jerk. You may have drunkenly said something that hurt the cleaners feelings, fed your ciggy butts to the dolphins, revelled in polystyrene, flown across the world a few times – something that warrants absolution. Help is at hand.

The answer:

The good folks at A4UNHCR, Australia’s branch of the United Nations Refugee Agency have decided to send the World’s Biggest Relief Package to the 300,000 refugees living in Dadaab, a camp near the Kenyan-Somali border.

And while we all know the UNHCR are good folks, this year you too can bask in their karmic glow all the while ticking the virtue box at Kris Kringle, impressing that special someone, proving you’re not a jerk and most importantly helping out someone whose life is pretty hellish right about now. Winners all round.

So, spend $12 bucks on a Jerry can (bout the same cost as 2 rolls of wrapping paper and a dodgy card), or shell out a little more coin if you can afford it to make to make the UNHCR’s World’s Biggest Package – HUGE.

Why?

Originally built for 90,000 people Dadaab is now home to more than 300,000 people, mostly those who have fled Somalia. So as you can imagine it is ridiculously overcrowded, no loos, limited food, without fresh water – the list goes on. Santa certainly does not visit Dadaab.

Add to this conundrum a dash of imminent flooding in the coming months and life in Dadaab is going to get even trickier - it’s a really rough deal, and we’re bloody lucky we weren’t born Somali – but don’t thank your stars, be part of the World’s Biggest Package.

Check out the website (great design once again from a Republic of Everyone/Circul8 collaboration), click some stuff, learn something new and maybe even part with a little cash.

www.worldsbiggestpackage.com

Get your rocks-off!...NY is simply [bike] pornographic

I've already confessed to fetishising bikes so finding NYC absolutely titillating will come as no surprise.

Mayor Bloomberg's award-winning work has made the five boroughs easy for cyclists , (I assume for the fact that one would need to be rich/mad/ostensibly patient to even consider driving) which means that NY is now awash with bicycles.

A bike is moored to a post every few metres. Each has its unique character: some are bawdy and over the top, others technological perversities; there are elegant fixies, and sissy bars and banana saddles galore.

Beyond simply painting the tarmac green and hoping for the best, the City has constructed dedicated bike lanes that isolate cyclists from other traffic. It means the chances of being run off the road by an angry bus or cab are lower and cyclists are guarded from surprise 'clothesline-style' dismounts (opening-car doors frighten the hell out of me).

Glorious pedestrian-free lanes that safely deliver over bridges, maps, bike fashion parades, guitar-shaped bike racks, bike clubs, big signs, greenways - not just being utilised by the slightly mad and fit, but by Nannas, business people, students, littler kids. Almost everybody in NYC is riding a bike - hallelujah!

[This said, the fact that I saw at most two people wearing stack hats was a little worrying, the whole ' I don't have to wear a helmet - you can make me' ethos must be firmly entrenched in the Bill of Rights...somewhere.]

Sydney could have all this and more. And while progress is being made, it is excruciatingly slow. People are still not confident enough to commute, when it comes to creating bike infrastructure it absolutely must be case of 'build it and they will come'.

We all know that bikes can save the world - obesity, peak oil, emissions, mental health etc. etc. - yet there is still widespread resistance. Silly duffers on Burke street protesting because they'll lose their car spot and obstructionist 'can't-do, won't-do' attitudes from unimaginative councillors means that rather than burgeoning into a progressive cosmopolitan city, Sydney will inevitably be known as a dirty, congested cesspit of a city. Particularly as the population swells in numbers (and size - yes, I mean fatter).

It's a calamity. But not hopeless. Doing your bit is easy.

1. Get your rocks-off with bike porn for a little inspiration - I will upload the best of mine and there is more here http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=126567&id=630785807

2. Get on yer' bike (especially all those duffers spending thousands of dollars on 'Boot-Camp' every morning - if you just rode to work your bum would be hard within weeks, you'd get to sleep in, save money and not undergo ritual public humiliation)

3. Have a whinge

Enjoy. And sincere apologies to my NY colleagues, pausing every few metres while I took pictures of bikes must have been really, really annoying - but you'll be 'right ;)

New York By Peer Review - Jesse Presley Jones

Irish Artist and current fellow at the Location One artspace, Jesse Presley Jones is another peer of Dan Cass, with whom I reviewed New York City.

As far as I could tell, Dan and Jesse met in Coober Pedy while shooting a film that was an adaptation of a Bertolt Brecht play. I have to admit I hadn't heard of Jesse or her art before but the Whisper Choir she conducted in Bucharest looked intriguing.

Jesse had been in New York for about a week - so not really a Phyllis-type experience but a great one nonetheless. An Irish artist, I met her at her Soho studio in the Location One artspace. As I walked in I was greeted by angry Richard Bell art - which was even more pointy taken out of the Australian context and dropped into NYC. It made Australia feel like a silly (racist) pimply teenager.

Anyways, Jesse and I meandered East over toward Bowery and the New Museum.

There's nothing like a gaudy artspace to help bond with an artist. It was the loudest, screechiest, over-done art gallery space I have ever been to in my whole entire life. Though it did give us something to tak about.

It's a pretty controversial space. Though no-one can doubt that it has been beautifully built, the heavy involvement of curators in the process has made the space feel like a five-year old chucking a tanty in a supermarket. The building screams attention and detracts from the works.

This was most offensive on the top floor where there was some great installation video art. But instead of being able to quietly sit-down and watch and attempt to 'get' it, the bloody door kept screeching open for the endless thoroughfare of people trying to get in and out of the room.

Having given-up, we had a coffee and checked-out the book store (which was by far the highlight of the whole experience) - which was kinda cool, Jesse kept pointing out books made by friends of hers and one where she herself featured. Needless to say, I was super impressed.

We headed-out and cruised the Bric-a-Brac, street art and cemetaries. Jesse gave some insight into how New York (calm and well-behaved) compared to Dublin (angry and a bit mental). It was also really interesting meeting an artist who was completely 'normal'. Not a skinny jean, hipster do, abnoxious iconic t-shirt or word of wank at all - it really made me think how freaking weird and pretentious the Sydney art scene actually is.